Divorce can happen due to many factors. Each couple has a different dynamic and has different odds when it comes to how they will manage a difficult situations. However there are issues that affect most couples that can lead to divorce:
What’s yours, is mine? According to survive divorce, this is one of the top causes of divorce. It doesn’t have that much to do with having little money. Couples in all the economic spectrum can experience money-related friction.
One spouse wants a new car every two years while the other is happy to drive any vehicle that is already paid off.
Money can be especially important to the degree that you don’t have it. When one spouse or the other loses a job or significant unexpected financial setbacks take place (think job loss, health crises, etc.), it can cause a big squeeze on family finances that may last for months or even years.
Money issues cause stress. Stress chokes off communication. A lack of communication leads to breakdowns in trust. And the result is often divorce.
If you find that you and your spouse are experiencing these issues, you’ll need to make an extra effort to keep communication strong and stick as much as possible to your budget. Probably won’t avoid all arguments, but it will make them more manageable.
Lack of support from family
In an article from the Insider, the lack of support from the family will have an impact on the marriage, funny enough, we can also find some ambivalence:
Per the Huffington Post, according to a 26-year longitudinal study that looked at 373 couples, a husband having a close relationship with his wife’s family decreased the risk of divorce by 20%. Conversely, when a wife reported having a close relationship with her husband’s parents, the couple’s risk of divorce increased by 20 percent.
As we enter to the fourth trimester of 2020, we probably are more aware than ever of how precious health is. A long difficult illness can put an extra strain on any kind of relationship, not only marriages, but they hurt them especially. As Elizabeth Ochoa, a marriage counselor told Health.com:
“Illnesses create debt and pain and loss of self. It can mean one partner isn’t able to maintain his or her part of the deal, which requires the other partner to step it up. Some couples will be better at dealing with that than others”
Both physical and emotional abuse can be major contributors of divorce. It must not be a surprise that these behaviors put a very high strain on the relationship, with cycles that can become more and more intense, making partners feel threatened physically.
According to the Insider:
The United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNDOC) found that 50,000 women who were intentionally killed in 2017 were killed by a romantic partner or family member.
Getting married too young
Here’s the thing. Our brains finish their development phase between 25 and 30 years of age. So, making too many life-altering decisions, like getting married, may cause regret later on. Survive divorce sets it clearly:
Couples who get married at an early age are more likely to face more money issues because their careers are not established yet. In some cases, they have not matured and do not understand how to communicate effectively. Without experience to guide them, a lack of maturity will often overtake a calmer approach to marital problems.
Young marriage problems can be further aggravated when a couple decides to have children at an early age as well. The amount of energy, effort, and financial resources required to engage in parenting can challenge a couple at any age. But when parents are still children themselves in some ways, the burdens of being a parent are overwhelming.
Too much conflict or arguing
According to a study done by the National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI), many of the individuals interviewed (57.7%) agreed that they grew tired and frustrated with their marriages when:
“communication problems increased in frequency and intensity throughout their marriages, which at times seemed to coincide with lost feelings of positive connections and mutual support.”
Infidelity or extramarital affairs
Here’s an interesting point: while many might consider this as a definitive reason for divorce, many of the participants of the cited above study mentioned it as the “the final straw”, for an already deteriorating relationship.
As reported by INSIDER, some common reasons for cheating, are feeling neglected, insecurity issues, or a fear of abandonment.
Lack of commitment
Surprisingly, the most frequently mentioned cause for divorce was lack of commitment.
Even though some would say that marriage is the ultimate commitment, 75% of the people surveyed said a lack of commitment played a part in the demise of their marriage.